Blessing

How long, O LORD? Will you forget me forever?

How long will you hide your face from me?

How long must I take counsel in my soul

and have sorrow in my heart all the day?

How long shall my enemy be exalted over me?

Consider and answer me, O LORD my God;

light up my eyes, lest I sleep the sleep of death,

lest my enemy say, "I have prevailed over him,"

lest my foes rejoice because I am shaken.

But I have trusted in your steadfast love;

my heart shall rejoice in your salvation.

I will sing to the LORD,

because he has dealt bountifully with me.*

God wants to hear from us, He wants us to pour out our hearts as David did. It's ok to feel alone and ignored and full of sorrow. It's ok to cry out to God to hear and answer! God wants us to trust Him in everything. This year has been a lesson for me in trust. How to trust God with my life and my future, my plans and my dreams, my studies and my commitments. There have been days when my energy has dwindled and my enthusiasm for things was shaky  Those times it was hard to smile and put on a positive face. When I feel like that I struggle to trust God and turn to Him. A couple of weeks ago I was in just that state of mind when I read the Psalm above. David says exactly what is on His heart, he expresses his fears and worries. I was comforted by this idea, that even a man renowned for his faith and dedication to God still felt and expressed such feelings. I was also challenged because in David's low points, he still remembers God's goodness!

I was challenged to trust in God's steadfast love, to let me heart rejoice in salvation, and feel free to sing with joy and enthusiasm to the LORD, and be thankful for the many blessings God has given. Being overjoyed is a strange feeling. I prayed and asked people to pray that God might fill me with joy in the following weeks after reading the Psalm. I have been reflecting on Paul's statement to be patient in affliction and so was waiting on God to answer my heart-felt prayers for help.** God answered, in a way that I cannot adequately express. During the past week I have been on a camping holiday. It wasn't the best experience of camping that I have ever had, but nothing that happened dampened my spirits! We had rain, hail, shine, wind, cloud, cold, and even fire bans! And in all of this somehow I was smiling and laughing, lighthearted and patient, quick to forgive and gentle in speech (or so I saw myself anyway!). I rejoiced in the chance to spend time with family, I delighted in the strange experiences we had to bond, and enjoyed the different climates God allowed us to experience. 

***

When the sun hid behind clouds on our walk down the hillside at the end of the bush walk, all my sister and I wanted was a chance to swim when we got to the beach at the bottom. Miraculously, the moment we stepped onto the beach the clouds parted and we had 10 minutes of blissful sun as we frolicked in the waves! When the rain came down and we were washed out of our tents and had to take shelter in a nearby laundry shed, I couldn't help but smile as we sat around waiting for the dinner to cook on the cooking pan over the washing machine as our spare clothes dried in the dryer, and the rain continued to pour! Life might throw us some bad weather, a moody week, or a challenging experience but as long as we turn to the God of the universe, and trust Him with our life and hopes, dreams and worries, fears and feelings God will bless us. Let us sing to the Lord,

"Every blessing You pour out

I'll turn back to praise

When the darkness closes in, Lord

Still I will say

Blessed be the name of the Lord

Blessed be Your name
....You give and take away
You give and take away
my heart will choose to say
Lord Blessed be Your name" ****

*Psalm 13
**Romans 12:12
*** Photo by me in Hawks Nest, NSW
****Matt Redman, Blessed Be Your Name