worth dying for

'it is my eager expectation and hope that I will not be at all ashamed, but that with full courage now as always Christ will be honored in my body, whether by life or by death.'*

Christ. The Messiah. Savior. 
Jesus of Nazareth, born and lived a life that fulfilled so many prophesies. But His last few days on earth as the most radical and life chaging. He, a prophet and good man, died. Innocent of any crimes.

'He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and live to righteousness. By his wounds you have been healed.'**

He died a painful death, to give me -us- freedom! God knows and sees our brokenness and the destruction of this good creation, and planned from the beginning to provide a Savior, a Liberator. What Jesus did, He believed was worth dying for. His actions defeated the power of death, and give hope of a new creation, without the corrution this universe now experiences.

“[A]nything worth dying for ... is certainly worth living for."***

I heard someone quote Joseph Heller the other day, and it made me think about how serious I am (not?) about my faith. Would I be prepared to die for it?
I'm not sure how I'd react if I was in such a life and death situation. But at least I can respond now by saying that if Jesus of Nazareth, as Savior of the whole world, believed I was worth dying for. Then I believe He is definitiely worth living for!

With this knowledge I have been challenged to see the breadth of what living with Him as Savior and King of the WHOLE world would be like:

 'To hope for a better future in this world -for the poor, the sick, the lonely and depressed, and the slaves, the refugees, the hungry and homeless, for the abused, the paranoid, the downtrodden and despairing, and in face for the whole wide, wonderful and wounded world - is not something else, something extra, something tacked on to 'the gospel' as an afterthought. ...It is a central, essential, vital and life-giving part of it.'****

Living for the Messiah in this life might be a lot of work, but it's just echoing what Jesus of Nazareth did while He was with us! Read any of the Gospel accounts and you can see His love for people here and now. It's a cause worth living... and dying for!

*Philippians 1:20
**1 Peter 2:24
***Joseph Heller, Catch 22
****Tom Wright, Surprised by Hope, p204

Copper Flower

'For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them.'*

Last week at church a lady told me that my life was like a copper flower, being made into something beautiful that would last, longer than a normal flower. It touched my heart, because there are times when it feels worthless, too painful, and repedative. But to know, that there is something beautiful coming out of this, makes it all worth while.

I like this clip by the Skit Guys based on the verse above:

I don't often stand and proudly say 'Steph is God's original masterpiece'. And just like 'Tommy' in the skit, my views of myself are often based on the world, not God's perspective.

I like this ancient poem by King David of Israel, it reminds me of how precious each individual person is. Every single human being on this earth can say this poem and know it to be true. And yet, in my heart I sometimes doubt that this fits me... that I am 'marvelous'.

^{You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body}

^{and knit me together in my mother's womb.}

^{Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex!}

^{Your workmanship is marvelous --- how  well I know it.}

^{You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion,}

^{as I was woven together in the dark of the womb.}

^{You saw me before I was born.}

^{Every day of my life was recorded in your book.}

^{Every moment was laid out}

^{before a single day had passed.}

^{How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.}

^{They cannot be numbered!}

^{I can't even count them,}

^{they outnumber the grains of sand!}

^{And when I wake up,}

^{you are still with me!**}

^{There is something comforting about knowing -at least for me- that I don't have to make all the decisions in my life! That I am part of a plan, part of a bigger story, it gives me a purpose}. And to think that God, Creator of me and the whole universe, thinks about me, thinks about His creation, in a loving and precious way, overwhelms me!

^{And it's not a dream! It's not wishful thinking! It's real, and I know it because of the way that God uses His chisel in my life.} I can see my life changing, things being cut out that I wouldn't have naturally thought bad or damaging. I trust that I am, indeed, being made into a beautiful lasting masterpiece... a copper flower?

*Ephesians 2:10
**Psalm 139:13-18 (NLT)

old snow

'Then he said to them all: “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross daily and follow me.'*

^Photo taken in Leipzig, December 2012, by myself

Snow is soft, fresh, white, beautiful! I have thoroughly enjoyed it in the last few weeks and months. There is something magical and delightful about watching it fall, and seeing it cover the earth in a sparling blanket!

After a few hours, however, people come out and about. they clear the roads and footpaths of snow, so they don't slip. They pile the snow in mounds by the road side, people walk their dogs, dogs do their business. Tiny stones are scattered to keep the ground rough for walking on. The snow absorbs the dirt around it. And before long, it is no longer sparling clean, but a dirty, not-so-glittering pile of wet cold stuff... with a bit of white beautiful snow on the side!

The transformation has put me to thinking about the things that i don't like about myself that come into my life without me wanting them there. For instance, I hope to speak graciously to those around me, but find myself snapping and gossiping. There are many things that I do which I regret or dislike. St Paul puts this frustration nicely when he says,

'I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.'**

The truth is, I don't have the power or strength of will to change by myself. Only with Jesus do I get the forgiveness and become right with God and myself and others. Then I can feel like new snow. Fresh, sparkling, radiant, pure... but I get comfortable with everything. Like old snow, I lose track of time, I get distracted, I get lazy, I forget, I procrastinate!

I have to keep reminding myself not to get carried away or lose my stability, instead seek to grow in the grace and knowledge of my Lord and Saviour Jesus Christ.*** The snow may look dirty and old, but the frozen water droplets will not stay that way forever. When the weather warms, they melt away, into the sifting soil, or evaporating back into the sky. Leaving behind the grime and dull stuff. In the same way, my life isn't perfect now, but One Day, it will be. Until then,

He has shown you, O mortal, what is good.

And what does the LORD require of you?
To act justly and to love mercy
and to walk humbly with your God.**** 

It's not an easy road to take, but It does have a positive end. If we do not lose hope and daily put aside our troubles and wrong doing, turning to the only One who can help; Jesus.
My hope for this year, is that I will be more disciplined and remember that putting faith in Jesus is not something I do once and don't worry about anymore, but something I do every day, denying self and following in His example.

*Luke 9:23
**Romans 7:15
***2 Peter 3:17-18
****Micah 6:8