Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruits.*
When I was in high school, there were days that I wondered what made a friend a friend. Honest statements are appreciated, but when they have a subtle jab, an insult, mockery. It hurts a lot more than words coming from non-friends. Add to that those words said from across the room from peers, not friends, can also stay long after we leave school. I remember several such painful occasions, when I wished I could sink into the concrete or change how I looked, or fast-forward high school! The sad thing is, it doesn't only happen at high school. It also happens in primary school. At university. At home. With family. With strangers. These situations scar us, they shape how we act, and how we see ourselves; mostly for the negative.
My soul is in the midst of lions; I lie down amid fiery beasts— the children of man, whose teeth are spears and arrows, whose tongues are sharp swords.**
Not good enough. It's not right. Words do hurt, they do break... maybe not bones, but hearts and self-esteem. When we are in such situations, or remembering such pain. We are free to cry out to god, like King David did:
Be not silent, O God of my praise! For wicked and deceitful mouths are opened against me, speaking against me with lying tongues. They encircle me with words of hate, and attack me without cause. In return for my love they accuse me, but I give myself to prayer. So they reward me evil for good, and hatred for my love.***
When God seems far off and we wonder if He is real, if he cares what is happening to us. We ought to remember not to retaliate. It will not solve or make things better to repay them. It might be satisfying for a moment, but in the long run, it only stretches out the pain, guilt and shame. Peter, one of Jesus' faithful disciples reminded followers:
Do not repay evil for evil or reviling for reviling, but on the contrary, bless, for to this you were called, that you may obtain a blessing. For “Whoever desires to love life and see good days, let him keep his tongue from evil and his lips from speaking deceit; let him turn away from evil and do good; let him seek peace and pursue it. For the eyes of the Lord are on the righteous, and his ears are open to their prayer. But the face of the Lord is against those who do evil.”****
Words can be used to break down and to build up. Often the bad cry louder than the good. I remember a friend telling me once how good I am at singing, and another reminding me what an inspiration I can be. The challenge is keeping the good words in balance with the bad.
There is a power in words. They are a double edged sword, to rip open and to bind back together. Proverbs reminds us that 'the tongue of the wise brings healing'.***** We all long for healing, to be made whole. To get away from the words spoken that still stick thorns into our minds and souls preventing us from wholeness. But God has the words to restore me, and you. He loves us. He cares for us. He watches over us. He provides for us.
But you, O God my Lord, deal on my behalf for your name's sake; because your steadfast love is good, deliver me! For I am poor and needy, and my heart is stricken within me. I am gone like a shadow at evening; I am shaken off like a locust. My knees are weak through fasting; my body has become gaunt, with no fat. I am an object of scorn to my accusers; when they see me, they wag their heads. Help me, O Lord my God! Save me according to your steadfast love! Let them now that this is your hand; you, O Lord, have done it! Let them curse, but you will bless! They arise and are put to shame, but your servant will be glad! May my accusers be clothed with dishonor; may they be wrapped in their own shame as in a cloak! With my mouth I will give great thanks to the Lord; I will praise him in the midst of the throng. For he stands at the right hand of the needy one, to save him from those who condemn his soul to death.***
*Proverbs 18:21
**Psalm 57:4
***Psalm 109:1-5, 21-31
****1 Peter 3:9-12
*****Proverbs 12:18
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